I heart Zach Morris.

In an age when spin-offs are way too popular, “Saved by the Bell” maintained its original flavor. Zach, Kelly Kapowski, Screech Powers and A.C. Slater were all included in “Saved by the Bell: The College Years,” the show’s quasi-spin-off that ended with Zach and Kelly getting married. Sorry if I ruined it.

That’s where it ended, though. I’d like to revisit the show and see where our ’90s TV buddies would be today. Let me speculate.

Zach and Kelly are still married. The show was way too fluffy and clean-cut to even fathom divorcing the perfect pair. I imagine Zach would’ve had a rich daddy, who would have given him a share of the family business. Zach was no Jessie Spano; he enjoyed having success handed to him. Hey, at least he was honest about it.

Kelly Kapowski is now Kelly Morris - no keeping her maiden name here, folks. She’s a soccer mom of 2.5 kids — a boy, a girl and - something. And she's president of the PTA. A very involved, devoted wife and mother, Kelly has probably been interviewed by Home & Garden at least three times.

Lisa Turtle is in massive credit-card debt. The days of whipping out a book of 10 valid credit cards are over. With a closet filled with shoes that is large enough to battle the Bayside High gymnasium in size, Lisa is undergoing a 12-step shop-o-holic program aimed to rid her of shameless shopping habits. To remedy her purchase withdrawal, Lisa works as a personal shopper.

Jessie Spano is a prominent “green movement” crusader. Always an environmentalist and bleeding-heart liberal, Jessie’s plate is full with Earth issues, and she never buys anything non-organic. She and A.C. Slater still have an on-again, off-again relationship, as they constantly bicker about why the recyclable plastic jar was found in the kitchen trash can.

A.C. Slater is perpetually working on a 1958 Cadillac Deville, which resides on his front lawn. During the day, he spends quality time with the Bayside High wrestling team. He peppers their practices with meaningful recollections of his glory days and many conquests. He’s constantly reminding them that, unless they do well in sports, they’ll never get into college.

Screech Powers and Dustin Diamond have become one person. Translation: Screech is now a dirty scoundrel.

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